Tuesday, October 6, 2009

It's Not the Children - It's Me

I had "one of those days" yesterday. My daughter was more defiant than usual, and I got frustrated. I find myself saying "I was so frustrated" way too often. Most of the time, it's because the kids simply won't obey! I mean, how hard is it to just do what I say? Everything wold be so much easier, but they just won't do it!

Over the past few weeks, God has been giving me gentle reminders that my frustration problem is about me, not about the kids. Just this morning, someone reminded me that our homes should be a place where our kids are free to sin, be lovingly disciplined, and see Christ in the process. My husband read something the other day that said discipline is only effective if the parents are more disciplined than the children. I've also been studying about my own wicked heart that cries, "I WANT, I WANT, I WANT" all day long and gets frustrated when I don't get what I want. The normal day-to-day challenges of parenthood are only exposing what's in my heart - the sinful desire to have perfect order, obedient children, and peace and quiet so my life will be a little "easier." But I'm confident that even if I had everything I "wanted" - order, obedience, peace - I would never be satisfied. I would find more to want. After all, a theologian once said that our hearts are idol factories. We always create something to worship that will never satisfy our souls.

Christ is our only satisfaction. Until we are fully satisfied in Christ, we will never be satisfied with our lives. Until I am perfectly content in Christ, I will always be frustrated with my children. I don't really want obedience and order; I want Jesus, and I need to make sure they want Him, too.

Lord, forgive me for seeking anything but Christ. Help me to set my heart on Jesus so my children can see that He alone satisfies.